How to Stop Your Parents from Interfering in Your Marriage
Parents mean the world to us, and rightly so. As we grow up, we get to learn the scope of the sacrifices they have made for us in the past and continue to do in the present. This is probably why a lot of us feel that our parents always know what is good for us. However, when you get married, things shift a little, and your relationship with your parents becomes a little more delicate. You have to find a way of accommodating your parents and your spouse at the same time. This piece guides you toward dealing with interfering parents.
- Manage your interactions.
Your parents certainly have the right to know how you are doing, and you should allow them into your life. However, there is a right way of doing it. You won’t have to host a dinner every other day; all interactions should be kept at a level that won’t destabilize your relationship with your partner.
- Don’t overshare.
Some interfering parents will want to know everything that is going on in your marriage. Once you share, they will have something to say, and it won’t always be helpful because they are naturally inclined to take your side.
- Never take sides.
When your parents and your spouse are in a standoff, never publicly take a side. Taking your parents’ side make your partner feel alone and unsupported. This just puts the people you love against each other.
- Consult your partner before involving your parents in your daily life.
There can be an overwhelming desire to invite your parents over for Super Bowl Weekend, and that is okay. What you need to realize is that you cannot make that decision alone and that your partner needs to have a say. It is his house, too, after all.
- Do not cancel on your partner because of your parents.
So, you have both been looking forward to a nice quiet dinner in a nice restaurant at the tail end of the week. However, your parents make a last-ditch call requesting a family meeting of all sorts. Whatever you do, do not just say yes without letting your partner know about it. Unless it is an emergency. Or if you really want to, perhaps you could go to that restaurant that you initially planned about and have an early dinner or so. Then you could go to your parents’ home after. The key is to let your partner know before you say yes to your parents and you both mutually agree on which one to do first.
- Manage your relationship with your parents.
You don’t have to break ties with your parents just to be with your partner. Allow them to be involved, but not intrusive. Keep them feeling as an important component of your life without being invasive.
- Empathize with your partner.
When your parents say something negative about your partner, make him understand that it’s not personal. Explain that he does not have to let anything that is said affect him. Parents, because of their protective nature, can act on the spur of the moment.